\\ presents . . . Star Trek III: The Search for Spock — Ch. 6: What Happens After the USS Enterprise Blows Up (Or: Kirk Scores a New Ride)

01:15:01 – The End Lt. Hulu took off his tunic and, bare-chested, began fencing with Dr. Macklemore on the bridge of the 15-Minute Federation. Hulu had a tendency to do this when he grew bored at his station, which was frequently. The helmsman was dueling with one of those collapseable plastic lightsabers, while the doctor […]

//\\ 15-Minute Federation //\\ presents . . . Star Trek III: The Search for Spock — Ch. 5: Extreme Late-Term Abortion (Or: Saavik is All Vulcan)

01:00:01 – 01:15:00 The 15-Minute Federation docked at Starbase 1234, and we were finally able to take some well-deserved shore leave. The base is governed by the benevolent duo known as Dave & Buster, known throughout the galaxy for their old-school video games and free-flowing beer taps. Captain James C. Firewater also had a secret […]

//\\ 15-Minute Federation //\\ presents . . . Star Trek III: The Search for Spock — Ch 2: The Enterprise is Getting Mothballed (Or: Let’s Go to the Instant Replay)

00:15:01 – 00:30:00 Captain James Claudius Firewater took the entire bridge crew with him on an away mission to Alpha Omicron Pi, where the all-female inhabitants of that tiny planet were raising revenue with something they called a CAR WASH. The plan was to get the 15-Minute Federation‘s shuttlecraft, the Copernicus Seven, cleaned and then […]

//\\ 15-Minute Federation //\\ presents . . . Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan — Chapter 6: Changing the Conditions of the Test (Or: Joachim Possessed the True Superior Intellect)

01:15:01 – 01:30:00 The 15-Minute Federation sent a landing party to the only M-class planet in the Big Box System, a world known as Walmartus IV. The landing party consisted of Captain James C. Firewater, Commander Spork, and Lt. O’Hara. Captain Firewater planned to negotiate a trade agreement for the 100-count box of dilithium crystals. […]

//\\ 15-Minute Federation //\\ presents . . . Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan — Chapter 5: KHAAAAAANNN!! (Or: Chekov as the Manchurian Candidate)

01:00:01 – 01:15:00 We could tell it was going to be a whimsical duty shift on the bridge of the 15-Minute Federation because comical oboe music was playing over the ceiling speakers and our alien guest stars were all speaking in exaggerated Irish brogues. On the orders of Captain James C. Firewater, Commander Spork had […]

//\\ 15-Minute Federation //\\ presents . . . Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan — Chapter 4: Taken Down by a Prefix Code (Or: Kirk Continues to Fail Upwards)

00:45:01 – 01:00:00 Lt. DiAngelo, the chief geologist on board the 15-Minute Federation (who’s never been seen by anyone before this fateful day), went on his first away mission with our Holy Trinity: Captain Firewater, Commander Spork and Dr. “Ribcage” Macklemore. He was killed just moments after the landing party materialized on the planet Pepp-Boyz […]

//\\ 15-Minute Federation //\\ presents . . . Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan — Chapter 3: Kirk Deals with an Angry Ex (Or: The Needs of the Many Outweigh the Needs of the Crew)

00:30:01 – 00:45:00 Nurse Transept has lodged a formal complaint because, other than the occasional pretty yeoman who briefly joins the crew, she is the only female on board the 15-Minute Federation. She says that this has led to a hostile work environment, and that she is forced to do double-duty as the voice of […]

//\\ 15-Minute Federation //\\ presents . . . Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan — Chapter 2: Chekov’s Terrarium (Or: Lt. Saavik’s Deviated Septum)

00:15:01 – 00:30:00 During the mission to Homeus Depotus VI, Commander Spork pricked his finger on a thorn of a rose bush in the planet’s garden center. It was one of those flowers that proliferate in the Trek Universe, and Dr. “Ribcage” Macklemore says the thorn prick will either kill Spork or else take over […]

//\\ 15-Minute Federation //\\ presents . . . Star Trek: The Motion Picture — Chapter 8: . . . And Then Decker Does Something (Or: Wait. What? And, Everyone Lived Happily Ever After)

01:45:01 – The End We beamed our landing party down to Homeus Depotus VI on a routine surveying mission. The landing party consisted of the following crewmembers: Captain James “Claudius” Firewater; Commander Spork; Dr. Dylan “Ribcage” Macklemore; a pretty female yeoman the captain recruited from Risa; and, two red-shirted dayworkers the landing party picked up […]

//\\ 15-Minute Federation //\\ presents . . . Star Trek: The Motion Picture — Chapter 7: Spock Completes a Side Mission (Or: V’ger Has Daddy Issues)

01:30:01 – 01:45:00 A new ensign joined us as navigator here on the bridge of the 15-Minute Federation. He has shaggy hair and goes by the name Shecky Pavlov. He looks a lot like Captain Firewater’s pet sheepdog. He also salivates every time he hears a bell ring. To be fair, he salivates when he […]

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